


Pickup Line (For a Lack Of a Better Title)

by ALFIEEE



Category: Heathers (1988), Heathers: The Musical - Murphy & O'Keefe
Genre: Crack JD, F/F, If by some miracle I decide to continue this fic, Intended to be a oneshot, It was unintentional okay, It's Just A Prank Bro, J.D seems like a jerk but he really wants the dare to happen, J.Ds a fanboy, JD doesn't murder anyone, Pickup lines cuz why not, The tags might get changed a little cuz why not, Title's lame. Deal with it, Truth or Dare, Yeep I continued it, also, but it doesn't really seem like it, except maybe indirectly murdering Veronica
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-15
Updated: 2020-02-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:42:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22742689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ALFIEEE/pseuds/ALFIEEE
Summary: Bored at lunch, J.D decides to coerce his group of friends into playing truth or dare to which they reluctantly agree to. After a while, he may or may not have indirectly caused Veronica's death by daring her the impossible. Will she go through with the dare and potentially get mauled by the Demon Queen herself? Or will she chicken out and face J.D's wrath?
Relationships: Heather Chandler/Veronica Sawyer
Comments: 23
Kudos: 208





	1. Picking her up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> JD gets the group to play truth or dare, he dares Veronica to do something that could kill her and Veronica isn't too happy about that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had this finished a while ago - the first chapter I mean - but I didn't want to post it just in case I decided to continue it so that I could post it as soon as the whole thing is finished but I've now decided to post it cuz why not?
> 
> J.D might be slightly OOC because I hadn't realised until after I had finished writing this chapter that he comes off as a total jerk oof. That was unintentional. 
> 
> Slight warning for a mention of two particular homophobic slurs (The D and F words) but they're only mentioned once. 
> 
> This hasn't been fully proofread too much (spell check - yes. But not proofread to the point of changing sentences to make them sound less awkward and make them flow better, unfortunately.)
> 
> Anyway, without further ado, please enjoy! ^_^

It was lunch break at Westerberg High School, which could usually be described as a battlefield with popular cliques harassing and mocking unpopular cliques. Today was no exception. If you were lucky, you could avoid all of this but that was unlikely. Almost everyone at this point, minus the more popular groups, had become victim to Kurt and Ram's lunch tray flipping antics after all.

Within this battlefield of a time, sat a certain group known throughout the school as 'the loser squad'. They were sat at a far off table, to the corner of the room, out of the way of any antics that could arise within the cafeteria. This group consisted of four people, one of which, clasped his hands together as he prepared to unveil his ingenious idea to the table. “Alright!” He paused, ensuring he had the attention of the rest of the table before continuing, “I propose we play a game.”

From the seat opposite him, Veronica raised an amused eyebrow, asking, “And what do you propose?”

Leaning into the curious group of three dramatically, J.D allowed a smirk to form on his face as he answered bluntly, “Truth or dare.”

He gained mixed reactions from the trio. Mostly looks that indicated they weren't too fond of the idea and J.D could see why. With Westerberg's variety of characters in the lunch hall, anyone could bare witness to whatever dare J.D had up his sleeves. Embarrassment was sure to await.

Even so, J.D persisted, “Come on, guys. It's just a little fun.”

Martha decided to speak up from beside Veronica with a slight stammer, “Uh, J.D, Isn't truth or dare a little...”

As she trailed off, Betty finished, “Extreme. For this time of day, I mean?”

Betty gestured to the entirety of the hall, which was packed to the brim with students at their own respective tables as if this would prove her point indirectly. This only served to make J.D grin wider, however, as he proceeded to tease, “Too chicken?”

He then made loud chicken sounds while flapping his arms as makeshift wings, catching the attention of a few nearby students. Veronica snorted while Betty and Martha tried to contain their giggles.

As soon as she had managed to contain her snorts, Veronica, through various bursts of small laughter, stated, “Sure, why not? I doubt he'd dare us to do anything he wouldn't do anyway.”

J.D, having resumed his usual posture and now having a smug smirk plastered on his face, looked between Martha and Betty, a silent question as to whether or not they were willing to follow Veronica's lead and play as well.

After a while, Martha caved in. “Fine. If Veronica's gonna play then I guess I'll play too.”

Despite the two girl's acceptance of J.D's suggestion of a game, Betty was still rather reluctant. “You guys are forgetting something...” She trailed off, attempting to find the right words to voice her concerns. “J.D would probably do a whole lot more things than we ever would.”

Veronica's face then morphed into slight reluctance once more as she said skeptically, “That's... true...” She stretched out the word as she seems to have fallen into her own thoughts as she turned her look towards J.D.

J.D's smug smirk faltered as his plan seemed to be falling apart as quickly as he had made it work. “Now, now guys,” J.D raised his hands in a placating motion to reassure them before continuing, “We can always have a backup punishment set up as an out in case you guys don't want to do the truth or dare.”

Veronica raised an eyebrow, an unspoken urge for him to explain.

“Like, say,” J.D trailed off in thought. As he finally settled on a reasonable example, he further explained, “Paying for the gang's next meal out.”

Seeing the trio's reluctant looks beginning to fall into slight acceptance, he decided to elaborate further, his smug grin returning as he was finally winning over the group, “Basically something less extreme social wise but still pretty extreme. Something equal but more doable.”

Betty's lips thinned, thinking this over before she finally sighed, giving in. She then spoke for the entire group and said in defeat, “Fine. Let's play.”

J.D's grin widened triumphantly as he clasped his hands together once more and asked, “Alright that settles it! Who's first?”

* * *

For the next half hour, the seemingly innocent game of Truth or Dare, while it had started out with simple questions and dares, it had quickly grown into an intense competition of who can come up with the worst dares. As for why it had grown into this, J.D had no comment but he was most certainly involved.

It had gotten to the point where the participants would rather pick the punishments instead. So J.D decided to fix this by increasing the difficulty of his punishments and, gradually, everyone else had followed suit.

J.D slammed his slushie cup to the table after finishing the concoction the other's had made for him, as per Betty's dare. He cringed as the aftertaste of his slushie, Veronica's coke, Martha's apple juice and Betty's water. Of course, as per Veronica's insistence that it counted because it was a smoothie, an added sachet of ketchup.

“Where'd you even get that slushie anyway?” Martha asked him, pointing towards his cup, despite the previous contents being more than just a slushie. “We don't even have a slushie machine on campus.”

With an attempt to ignore the terrible after taste of the terrible concoction, he replied, “I have my ways.”

He then lifted his gaze to the girl in front of him, a smirk playing on his lips. “Veronica, truth or dare?”

Having chosen truth for the past few rounds, Veronica felt obligated to choose the other option. “Dare.” She said firmly, her eyes narrowing in challenge, daring him to pick the most terrible – in his case, _best_ – dare he could think of.

J.D rose to the challenge, scanning the cafeteria in search of a potential victim. His gaze fell to Ram and, as funny as Veronica confessing to Ram with a boom box in hand blasting all the latest love song hits sounds, he dismissed him. He was saving that dare for Martha. Next to Ram was Kurt but J.D quickly dismissed him too. He was in search of someone who could potentially go as far as to _kill_ Veronica.

His smirk widened as his eyes fell on Heather Chandler, the demon queen of Westerberg. Veronica soon followed his gaze and paled. “No.” She said as her face took on a look of horror. “No, no, no, no, no.”

J.D turned back to Veronica, his devilish smirk now in full view.

“You wouldn't.” Veronica quietly stated, worry clear in her tone.

J.D offered no direct response. “Veronica, I dare you...” He trailed off, feigning thinking in wonder before continuing, having 'settled' on his dare, “To kiss Heather Chandler.”

Veronica was toast. This was so much worse than anything she could have ever imagined. As her worst fears were confirmed, she was internally cursing. _Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck._

Kissing Heather Chandler was every guy's biggest dream, something almost impossible to do and yet J.D had expected her to be able to just waltz up to her and just do it? In front of the entire student body? This was practically social suicide, even more so than what her loser status had given her.

“Are you kidding?” Veronica hissed, leaning over the table with her fearful expression being replaced with one of anger. Although she was almost completely certain that he was serious, she had a shed of hope that he was just playing some cruel trick on her. “She'll _kill_ me!”

It was true. Maybe. Possibly.

Okay, so _maybe_ she had never seen anyone try to kiss Heather Chandler without her approval first and _maybe_ she had never seen anyone initiate any kisses with the demon queen themselves so the reaction that Veronica had played in her head several times was not entirely definite.

“You want an out?” J.D asked, pulling Veronica out of her thoughts with the question he had always provided his victims when they weren't particularly fond of his choice of dares. “Chicken.” He added in a teasing tone which only served to irk Veronica further.

“Yes,” Veronica replied bluntly, her eyes narrowing further as her glare was returned with his teasingly smug grin. “Obviously.”

The smug grin didn't seem to falter as J.D gave her the punishment dare almost instantly, “Okay then, use a pickup line on Heather Chandler.”

J.D observed as Veronica's face morphed into a mix of shock, anger and irritation. It was mildly amusing to him, especially when the other two looked between Veronica and J.D in worry as if he was going to get mauled by her.

He shot the other two pleading looks, internally begging them to encourage the girl sat opposite him to do either dare. They, however, disappointed him when Betty spoke up, “Shouldn't you come up with a more safer dare?”

Martha soon agreed, voicing up her own concerns, “Maybe something that _doesn't_ involve Heather Chandler?”

Veronica nodded along as J.D's smug grin dropped. This wasn't going to plan. _Dammit_.

“No one could even go as far as to _stand_ near her without her throwing some hissy fit. If Veronica were to say a pickup line, much less _speak_ to her, her life will be over.” Martha continued, not helping the situation at all.

“I mean if a guy were to say a pickup line then they might just get away with a slap on the wrist,” Betty trailed off, figuring out how to say her counterpoint under J.D's awaiting gaze. “But Veronica's a _girl_. I have no doubts that her reaction is going to be so much worse.”

Great. These two were useless at encouragement. It was now up to J.D to be able to get the satisfaction of his dare being played out. His smirk grin returned to his face. Confidence is key, after all.

“By all means, don't do it.” J.D said, raising his hands to reassure her. “I have other ways of which you can indirectly do the dare through me but I must warn you, it may be worse than kissing her.”

As he was silently commending himself on his slightly evil act, Veronica's eyes narrowed once more at him as she demanded, “What ways exactly?”

“Well, I mean, I _could_ write her a pretty sappy, long, poetic love letter in your name? I know how to forge your handwriting pretty well.” He replied.

Blackmail was something he excelled in. He didn't know why he was so insistent on the dare being done, but he was receiving a heck of a lot of amusement from it.

Veronica's face dropped as fear seemed to have slipped onto her features. Martha and Betty looked rather concerned for their friend but remained silent.

Veronica opened her mouth to reply, but before she could say anything to protest, the bell rung, signalling the end of lunch break. As the group stood up to follow the crowd of students to their classroom, J.D whispered to Veronica, “You have until the end of tomorrow to do one, or both, of the dares.”

Veronica groaned. Great. This was not going to end well.

* * *

Veronica was sat in the library at one of the tables with stacks of books in front of her, shielding her from any onlookers. Out of all the books on the shelves, and there were hundreds, if not thousands, of them in there, she had only managed to find two books of pickup lines.

During her final lesson of the day, she had decided to go to the library after school to do some research and now that she was finally there, it dawned on her just how close it would be until the deadline of the dare came. J.D was one evil human.

She had one of the books open and, scanning over the pages, she rolled her eyes for what felt like the millionth time. All of the pickup lines were too cheesy. For both her and Heather. It probably didn't matter too much since she was probably going to get murdered before she even spoke the first syllable.

But, alas, if she were going to die, she may as well choose the best pickup line to use – even if she weren't going to be able to say the entire thing before her inevitable death.

Oh great, her last words are going to be a pickup line.

Holding in her groan at that thought, she read the next pickup line.

**Do you have a map? Because I got lost in your eyes.**

It was good but sappy. Heather wouldn't like it.

**Are you my maths homework? Because I'll be slamming you against the desk and doing you all ni-**

Veronica abruptly slammed the book closed with a small jump as a hint of a blush spread across her cheeks. She was most definitely _not_ using that one. She'd get too embarrassed halfway through and turn into a stuttering mess. Also, the obvious implications of it don't seem like it would make her less likely to die by the hands of Heather. But more the latter than the former. Obviously.

Shaking this from her thoughts, she slid the book aside and decided to open the next one. She wasn't quite sure what sort of pickup line she had wanted to use so she had no real direction when looking over the pickup lines in the book. Maybe she could play around with ones to do with demons? Considering Heather Chandler's demon queen status paired with the fact that she had fully embraced the title, It would be rather fit to start looking for demon-specific lines, or even think of her own ones.

Or maybe she could start looking for pickup lines to do with Heather's signature colour? She might like a red-themed line slightly more than any other random pickup line. Maybe. Possibly. Not really, no.

Who was she kidding? Heather was going to kill her anyway. There's no point in being poetic about it.

By the time the library's closing hours drew near, Veronica had compiled a fairly big list of potential pickup lines. She had chosen several just in case she happened to have forgotten the one she settled on - out of embarrassment, most likely - she would at least have a couple of backups that she could rely on.

She had figured that in order to soften the blow, she would have to choose compliment-based pickup lines. Heather may be vain and respond with the fact that she already knew, but Veronica figured that she would be let off with a slap on the wrist. Hopefully.

She obviously avoided the sorts of pickup lines that even remotely hinted at the feelings that she definitely didn't have. Saying those would be like a death wish. Maybe certain guys could get away with a slap on the wrist from saying them, but Veronica was a girl and she was fairly certain that Heather was straight and wouldn't welcome those kinds of lines from another girl.

And with that, the pickup line was sorted. Mostly.

Now Veronica had to figure out how to get Heather Chandler alone. She most definitely did not want Heather to make a scene out of it to the rest of the student body, or even just the other Heathers. Word would spread like wildfire about how a dork had just attempted to flirt with the Demon Queen of Westerberg and she would most likely be called derogatory nicknames – such as dyke or fag – for the rest of her school years.

Sure, if they were alone it could still transpire like that. But Heather would probably not react as badly and, if she were really lucky, maybe she wouldn't spread the word around that a girl attempted to flirt with her. Veronica could only hope.

She'll have to brace herself for the worst-case scenario for tomorrow's events.

* * *

The next morning came by quicker than Veronica would have liked. Yes, sure she was well prepared with a perfectly feasible plan but was she emotionally ready for this? Fuck no. J.D had given her until the end of the day to put her plans into action which meant that if she hadn't successfully said the pickup line by the end of the school day, she'd probably have to find Heather out of school lest J.D write that love letter he told her about.

She finished that final words of the note and smiled. “Okay, forged note done!” She said, pocketing her pen before folding the note into two. This was the simplest step in her plan. Forge a note – so that Heather wouldn't know it was her – to ask to met her alone and put said note into Heather's locker at the earliest hour of the day, where there wouldn't exactly be any people there to see her actions.

This was to ensure that Heather would read it and also to ensure that nobody would see her, especially the Demon Queen herself.

She speed-walked over to the locker and quickly shoved the note inside the slit, fiddling slightly as she had trouble through her haste. After a moment, she had successfully put it in and rushed back to her own locker, her heart racing a mile a minute as if she had almost gotten caught despite the fact that no one else was currently in sight.

Breathing a sigh of relief, she thought, _Now it's time to wait_.

* * *

First break soon arrived and Veronica found herself in one of the bathrooms that the Heather's have unofficially claimed for themselves. Because the Heather's would glare down anyone who dared enter a bathroom they were in, no one would dare enter it again. Fortunately for Veronica, there happened to be two bathrooms that they have claimed and it just so happens that they would most likely be using the one closest to the cafeteria for this time of day so she was safe. For now.

A good 5 minutes had passed by now, or at least Veronica had assumed since she didn't have any sense of time, and she was getting nervous. She had wanted to get this over and done with as soon as she could so that she couldn't get a chance to overthink it, but now that was getting rather difficult.

She knew it took a while, probably 10 minutes or so, to get here from where Heather's lesson was located, but she couldn't help her fidgeting. It was also a fact that Heather Chandler liked to arrive fashionably late, which, if she did happen to do so, Veronica was probably going to escape before she could enact the dare.

5 minutes turned to 15 and Veronica was beginning to lose hope. There were only about 5 minutes left of break at this point so Heather was probably not going to show up at all.

Great. So much for waking up early.

As she was racking her brain for anything she could say to beg J.D for an extension on the dare – since she was not willing to try again at lunch break in front of everybody or show up at Heather Chandler's house for that matter – the door to the bathroom opened.

Veronica quickly straightened herself and attempted to stop fidgeting as Heather Chandler walked in.

Was it hot in here or was it just Heather? Veronica subtly shook the thought from her mind. She had to say the pickup line out loud not in her head. Focus.

Heather's eyes narrowed as she caught sight of Veronica in front of her and, as she allowed the door to slam loudly behind her, Veronica noted the absence of the other two Heathers and let out a small breath of relief.

“Sawyer,” Heather stated, crossing her arms. Veronica was a little surprised that the red Heather knew her name – well, _last_ name – but she didn't dare speak up about it and allowed Heather to continue, “What could you possibly want that would warrant us to have this conversation _alone_ in a bathroom.”

Veronica gulped. Hopefully inaudibly. She seemed pissed. Well, yes, she was always pissed but as of that moment, she was more pissed than usual.

Well, here goes nothing.

“Well, I, uh,” She cleared her throat, attempting to get rid of the stutters that plagued her now that she was talking and nervous. Extremely nervous. Her hands were beginning to sweat and has it gotten hotter? Or was it just-

Yeah, she was _not_ thinking that one again.

“Spit it out, Sawyer. I don't have all day.” Came Heather's annoyed tone, forcing Veronica to raise her gaze to Heather herself, as she had just realised she was nervously observing the ground.

Veronica attempted to fill herself with confidence, or at least gain an air of confidence, as she took a few steps closer, but not too many to cause the other girl to get any more mad.

“Well, I just wanted to say,” She trailed off, willing herself to remember the pickup line she had settled on the previous day. She felt her cheeks begin to heat up as she voiced the only pickup line she could remember, “I always thought the source of Hell's hotness was fire but I was wrong, it's you.”

There. Done.

She was forced to await Heather's inevitable shouts – as Heather was currently blocking the exit – but they never came. She seemed a little out of it. Maybe she was just shocked and needed a little time to recover and sort out what just happened in her head?

But it was taking too long. As Veronica chanced a step closer to Heather, to maybe invoke a reaction out of her other than the constant staring, she saw a flush of red on her cheeks.

Wait, was Heather Chandler – Heather _fucking_ Chandler – _blushing?_

At this revelation, Veronica allowed a smug grin to take over her features. Maybe she could have the upper hand in this conversation? Heather was probably going to be furious, but Veronica could at least have a bit of fun embarrassing the other girl first before her inevitable death.

She walked even closer, at a casual pace as she proceeded to say with a casual tone, “You know, now that I think about it,” She trailed off slightly, as she had managed to back the other girl into the wall behind them. She looked into Heather's eyes and, noting how pretty they were, a pickup line come to mind as she spoke, “I'd match your eyes to a Pantone colour but there isn't a colour for beautiful yet.”

Fuck. What was she doing? She was going overboard with this. She couldn't help herself though as she placed her hand against the wall besides Heather.

Heather Chandler was most definitely speechless. A dork _was_ trying to hit on her after all and a female one at that.

Her expression was indescribable as she just let Veronica have her way for now. She didn't know how to react. Well, she _knew_ she was supposed to be angry, but she was too shocked to even think of anything she could say to the dork uncomfortably close to her.

Veronica leaned in closer, placing a hand on her cheek. In any normal situation, Heather would have slapped it off.

In a voice just above a whisper, Veronica said, “If one day you wake up in a red room, don't be alarmed, you're just in my heart.”

The scent of cherries made her mind go blank as she dove down, her lips meeting Heather's. The only thing she could think of was how soft Heather's lips were. She barely registered the other girl kissing her back and her questions of why were quickly diminished as Heather's hands rested on her shoulders.

The bell rung – was it just her or was the bell several minutes late? - and both girls quickly jumped apart. Veronica's mind slowly, but surely, returning to normal as she played back the recent events in her mind.

 _Fuck._ Veronica's eyes widened. _Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck._ She was dead. She was so dead. She could barely scramble away from the other girl before she pushed her away.

With a piercing glare, she yelled, “What the fuck?!”

Veronica panicked. This was it. She enacted both dares and now this was how she would die. At the hands of the Demon Queen herself.

“Who the _fuck_ do you think you are?” Heather demanded.

With her mind still clouded with the kiss, Veronica, through her panicked state, told her, “Veronica Sawyer.”

Unable to help herself as she was already dead, she added, “And if you play your cards right, you might just get my last name.”

Fuck.

She probably shouldn't have said that.

Heather was furious, that much was clear. But rather than yell at her, she simply huffed and left the bathroom. Veronica was slightly confused but was more panicked as she had given Heather the motive and the ammo to kill her once and for all.

She was so dead.


	2. The Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heather is totally normal, Veronica reports back to the team and JD is acting a little weird.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SUP! I decided to continue this if it wasn't obvious already. You can probably expect my updates to be about 3 weeks to a month but I update my progress on chapters (Of this and two other stories) on my Twitter @alfieeewrites if ya curious about that (I try to update often so sometimes you can get like 10 per day if I'm inspired)
> 
> Proofread by Grammarly and Grammarly only cuz OpenOffice is being a douche and putting that red squiggle line thing underneath EVERY word XD  
> (I might proofread it myself later though just in case)
> 
> BY THE WAY!! I think somewhere between the first draft and second draft of this chapter, I became too lazy to put that dot in J.D's name and just ended up writing 'JD' throughout the entire chapter (Just wanted to point that out cuz I've been writing it with a dot in the first chapter).

As soon as the bathroom door shut behind her, Heather's casual stride turned into a borderline run as she rushed to her next class. Fuck being fashionably late, she wanted – _needed_ – to get as far away from Sawyer as possible.

She raised a hand to touch her lips. The tingling sensation of where Sawyer's lips once were remained. She could almost still _feel_ the other girl's lips on hers and it was driving her crazy.

Why did Sawyer have this effect on her?

Better yet, why the hell did she even kiss her in the first place?

* * *

It had been two hours, give or take, since the 'incident' in the bathrooms. Veronica was left uneasy with her overactive imagination. At first, her guesses of what Heather would do to her didn't seem so bad – well it _was_ bad but nothing she couldn't handle – but then it had quickly spiralled out of control even going as far as to contain some supernatural elements to it before she stopped herself.

Little to be said, she didn't learn anything in those two lessons. Mostly due to a lack of concentration.

Her worries had only seemed to pile on, however, when she entered the cafeteria. No eyes were on her. No murmurs about her. Nothing.

The whole school should be onto her by now. The rumour should have spread like wildfire and Veronica should be shoved, called derogatory names and the sort.

But nothing was happening.

Her unease didn't waver once she arrived at her usual table and almost dropped herself down on her usual seat opposite JD, who seemed to be baring a smug smirk. Martha and Betty were there too, their faces baring curious yet concerned looks as they watched Veronica.

“I didn't hear any rumours in class.” JD casually remarked, his smug grin revealing his true intentions – not that Veronica wouldn't have been able to guess if it weren't there. “Did you do the dare?”

Veronica groaned, brief pictures of Heather's blushing face as well as her shocked look flashing in her mind. She didn't want to remember. Remembering only made her feel more uneasy. More nervous.

“You didn't?” Martha asked, a look of relief coming onto her face as she mistook the groan being for a different reason. “Thank God.”

Veronica opened her mouth to reply, to tell the truth, but Betty spoke before she could think of how to phrase it.

“You're not gonna die.” She sounded relieved. Veronica couldn't blame her, honestly. She had just supposedly escaped the wrath of the Demon Queen. Well, the dare anyway. Or at least, that's what the two girls thought and Veronica had to tell them the truth.

“I did!” Veronica blurted out, causing a few bystanders to look in her direction for a while before continuing with whatever they were doing beforehand. Clearing her throat, she was initially intending to correct the two girls, but what came out instead was entire word vomit.

“I did the dare, okay! I got her to meet me in one of the bathrooms alone and she came. Alone. And she was doing her whole demon queen act and I said the pickup line and then I said another because she looked so damned funny that I wanted to do another but then after the second one I accidentally said a third one and I couldn't help it, okay?”

She had decided to conveniently leave out the part about the kiss. It wasn't _that_ important. Sure it was the original dare and sure the gang – especially JD for some reason – would definitely want to know about it, but she had explicitly intended to do the punishment dare and so she'll act as if the kiss hadn't happened.

Well, until the rumours begin to spread.

In which case, it'd probably be best to say it now so that they could hear it from her rather than a bunch of rumours. That was what the logical side of her was saying at least.

The illogical side? It was too embarrassing so she'd rather forget the kiss had ever happed.

And so she decided to not tell them. She just hoped they didn't ask or else she may not be able to hide it.

As she was engaging in this internal battle with herself, JD's face morphed into a smug grin once more – Veronica hadn't noticed it go – and repeated with a laugh, “Three? God, Veronica, you surprise me every day.”

Betty, however, looked as concerned as ever. With a raised eyebrow and a slight shake of her head, she said, “Saying one was already going to get you killed but _three?”_

Veronica felt the need to rise to her own defence. So she did. “I accidentally, okay!” She shouted. She couldn't say much more than that. She had no other reasons – proper reasons – for her actions. Nothing to convince them that her actions were accidental. Even so, their main concerns were with the _consequences,_ not quite the actions themselves.

JD was quick to interrupt, changing the subject ever so slightly as he questioned, “So you've done the punishment dare... thrice.” He stated the obvious. Veronica could have sworn she saw a twinkle of mischief in his eyes as he continued, “But did you kill two birds with one stone and kiss her?”

Fuck. Veronica wasn't ready for that.

The feeling of Heather's lips against her own flashed into her mind and her cheeks reddened dramatically. Her eyes widened. Maybe if JD had implied the dare without outright saying it, she could have denied it with very little evidence on her face. But here she was, directly in front of JD's observant eyes, cheeks red, eyes adverted. All evidence suggested that if she were to deny it, it would have been a lie.

Fuck.

She stayed silent, not wanting to embarrass herself further by actually admitting to it. To kissing Heather Chandler.

The teasing grin dropped from JD's face as he came to realise something. “Oh my God...” He seemed shocked. Almost breathless as if he was too shocked to remember how to breathe. He suddenly grew giddy, suddenly unable to sit still as he bounced on his chair in excitement and made exaggerated movements with his arms. “You kissed her!”

As a stark contrast to JD's excitement, both Martha and Betty held their own looks that seemed to be a mix of shock, horror and concern. Of course, they were the sensible ones. Martha was the first between the two to voice her concerns.

“Wait, hold on, you _actually_ kissed her?” She was in disbelief. Of course, she would be. Veronica had been accused of kissing the Demon Queen of the school despite knowing that she would die if she did and-

She needed to stop thinking about that.

She distracted herself a little by picking up her fork to play around with her food slightly. She didn't eat any of it or even show any signs of doing so anytime soon, but it forced her awkward posture to focus on something else. She needed to relax.

“Maybe.” She muttered almost inaudibly.

A squeal sounded throughout the cafeteria. It was loud and octaves above anything Martha could achieve when she watches The Princess Bride.

Snapping her head up, she saw that the sound had come from JD, who was smiling from ear to ear and had his eyes clenched shut.

Veronica blinked in confusion but before she could think to ask about the squeal – which Veronica thought was unnecessary – Betty spoke up. “Okay...” She trailed off in thought, her face was concentrated and she seemed to be in a daze. She lifted her gaze to look at Veronica as the rest of the group shifted their attention to her. “So how come you're not dead yet?”

Veronica wished she knew the answer to that.

Betty was suspicious and Veronica couldn't blame her. Veronica had just _kissed_ Heather Chandler and had gotten away with it. That was close to getting away with murder as far as anyone else at this school was concerned. Heather Chandler was like a priceless museum artefact. Just look. Don't touch. Unless you wish to face some serious consequences.

Just thinking about it put her at unease. There were no rumours, no shoves, no pranks, just nothing. Heather must be planning something. Something absolutely horrifying that no other student could possibly replicate. She must be taking her time with planning to ensure that every last detail has been thought out to ensure that there would be no room to fail and-

Veronica shook the thoughts from her mind and gave Betty a reply, “I don't know, okay! I definitely did do it! She must just be carefully calculating how to destroy my life or something.”

Martha, after swallowing her small bite of sandwich, said, “That does seem like Heather.”

Great. So much for friendly support, huh? So much for consolation. No 'Veronica, she's surely not going to do anything _too_ bad'. Just 'yep. You're toast.'

Veronica turned back to her food, stabbing at it with her fork. She only stopped when she heard JD's voice, “Now that I look at her, she looks kind of out of it...”

Veronica lifted her gaze to JD, finding his head turned around – not subtle at all – to look directly towards the Heathers' table. She soon followed his gaze to the lead Heather, clad in her usual red blazer.

She wasn't talking to the other two. But the other two weren't talking either. It wasn't that unusual. They had moments of silence after all their gossips and insults from time to time. But as she looked closer, looking terribly hard for something to justify JD's claims, she had noticed something. Heather was dazed, almost runny completely on autopilot.

“Hm? Does she?” Martha asked. “I don't see it.”

Maybe Veronica was imagining things then?

“Still looks like Westerberg's Demon Queen to me.” Betty chimed in after a beat.

Veronica turned to the other two before turning back to Heather. No, she was definitely not imagining it. Heather was definitely... off. Was it her doing? Did the 'incident' really affect her that much?

It was then that Heather's eyes met hers. Her heart sped up – presumably fear at getting caught looking – as she swiftly averted her gaze. JD was likely giving Heather one of his infamous smirks as he didn't bother to turn around to face the group once more.

Veronica knew for sure that she may have gotten away with her actions for now but she was surely going to meet her inevitable end soon.

* * *

To say that Heather Chandler was 'out of it' was an understatement. It had been just over two hours since _that_ happened. She had assumed that she would get over it by lunch but, as she sat at her usual table with Duke and Mac, she couldn't help but remain silent as her mind wandered elsewhere.

She should be plotting _her_ execution! Not replaying the encounter on loop! She should have been spending her last two lessons pretending to write notes while really writing down a heavily detailed plan on how to ruin _her_ life. But no! She had spent those lessons in a daze, barely listening to the teacher – It wasn't as if she was going to anyway – her thoughts elsewhere.

“Heather?” Mac called out in concern, snapping Heather out of the daze she hadn't noticed she slipped into. “You okay?” She added after getting the other girl's attention, her voice laced with concern.

Before Heather could answer, Duke decided to chime in, her tone as smug as ever as she snickered, “Yeah, you've been eating with a knife and fork for a while now.”

Heather glared at the green girl. What was wrong with that? It was perfectly normal.

“So what? It's normal.” She said angrily after a beat and raised her fork to her mouth, taking another bite of her sandwich. Right. That was it. She was eating a sandwich with a fucking knife and fork. She refused to let her confidence waver though because if she did, she wouldn't be Heather Chandler, would she?

“You're eating a sandwich.” Came Duke's blunt reply as the smug grin dropped into something expressionless. Well, almost expressionless. She looked disbelieved.

Despite her obvious fault, Heather still attempted to excuse it, “It's a new trend.”

Instead of letting it go, Mac decided to press on, concern easily identifiable in her voice as she spoke, “Did something happen? You don't seem like yourself...”

She trailed off as Heather's scowl worsened. Her glare shifted over to the yellow girl, eliciting slight fear to course through her body. Heather almost smirked at this but stopped herself – mainly because the other two idiots may think it's okay to continue speaking and, frankly, she's had enough of them already – and instead said, “I'm fine, Heather. Just drop it.”

She said it a little harsher than she had intended, but it had given her the results she was hoping for nonetheless. Mac nodded shyly before looking back down at her lunch tray and prodding her food with a fork.

“Sorry, Heather...” She said meekly.

Before Heather could slip back into her Sawyer induced daze, Duke voiced up yet again, much to Heather's annoyance, “Don't we have to get going soon anyway?”

Duke didn't give Heather any time to question her statement before she elaborated after a pause, “Especially if you want to get the lunchtime poll done before the bell rings.”

Shit. She almost forgot about that.

“Right.” She muttered, turning to her bag next to her, making sure to keep her pace normal to cover up the fact that she had forgotten. She rummaged around for the clipboard that she _swore_ she put in her bag that day after thinking of the question.

Her search became the slightest bit more frantic as she couldn't find it. She cursed under her breath as she was alarmingly aware of how she looked desperate – which she was sure wasn't a good look on her.

Duke cleared her throat with a cough and said, “Uh, Heather?”

As Heather snapped her head up with one of her infamous glares, Duke flinched. Despite that glare unnerving her, however, Duke gestured towards the clipboard she had in her hands and explained, “You told me to look after it this morning, remember? You said that it would make your bag heavy or something.”

Heather almost let out a groan as the events from that morning's exchange flashed in her mind. Stupid Sawyer making her forget and making her feel like an idiot. It was all Sawyer's fault. If it weren't for Sawyer and the little 'incident' surrounding her, then Heather would have been in a perfect state to remember rather than being in a daze-like state all the time. If it weren't for Sawyer then she wouldn't have made a fool of herself.

So, in order for her to not make a further fool of herself, she decided that it would be best for her to do the lunchtime poll herself. Yes, this plan was flawed in so many ways, but Heather had never stopped to consider these flaws before the words flew out of her mouth, “Heather, I can do the poll myself. Keep Heather company.”

She grabbed – more like _snatched –_ the clipboard off of Duke. Before she could take her leave, however, Duke asked with an eyebrow raised, “You sure?”

“Yes.”

And with that, Heather turned and left for the first table that entered her sight. The other two Heather's were probably watching her, but she didn't bother to look back to check or give them a glare. Instead, she simply arrived at the first table with her clipboard and pen at the ready, a sickeningly sweet – fake – smile plastered on her face.

“Alright,” She said, gaining the rest of the attention of the table who hadn't noticed her presence as she arrived. “If you had the world's attention for 30 seconds, what would you say?”

* * *

Heather frowned at the multitude of answers that were written down on the clipboard. They weren't _bad._ Well, _most_ of them weren't _bad._ Save for the Jock's answers – featuring Kurt and Ram – who were going to use the 30 seconds to promote their made-up sport and whatnot.

She had considered almost all of them stupid – and at times she had verbally expressed this – but it wasn't like she was too focused on the questions to care.

“Yo, Chandler!”

Heather snapped her head up after writing down the final answer she had received. _A love confession. Gross._ She had found that one of the losers from the infamous Loser Squad was ushering her over with a wave of his hand. Who was he again? He was so beneath her that she hadn't bothered to remember. Whatever, she'll just call him Trenchcoat Kid. She didn't care.

As she slowly made her way over, she could see Sawyer leaned over the table hissing something at Trenchcoat Kid. He seemed to be ignoring her though in favour of giving Heather a wide, mischievous grin.

She was beyond irritation. And very much not ready in the slightest to face Sawyer. So she avoided even acknowledging Sawyer's very existence at the table – which, to be fair, she also did to Dumptruck and the nerd at their table so Sawyer wasn't special or anything - and instead chose to give Trenchcoat Kid one of her best glares.

“What do you want?” She demanded, hoping that he'd get the hint that she had better things to do than speak to the scum of the school.

He didn't.

“I was wondering...” He trailed off purposely, irking Heather further as she tapped her fingers against the clipboard impatiently. After a full minute, Heather was just about ready to turn around and storm off when Trenchcoat Kid continued, “If we, what do you call us again?”

He gave a puzzled look towards Heather before shifting it one by one to the other members of the table, who all stayed silent. Heather almost smirked. It was because she was here that they were silent. Maybe not Sawyer so much. But she still took pride in being able to scare Dumptruck and the nerd to silence.

He clapped his hands together which had made most occupants of the table jump since the sound was both loud and sudden. Heather almost jumped as well, but she'll never admit that.

“Right! The Loser Squad!” He said as if he had suddenly remembered it. Heather was almost completely sure that he knew it all along and had just feigned it for dramatic effect. Before she could repeat her initial question in utter annoyance, Trenchcoat Kid continued, “I was wondering if we, The Loser Squad, could participate in the poll?”

Fuck no.

Or at least, that's what she would have said if it didn't occur to her that if she hadn't then Trenchcoat Kid will probably keep her here longer and, although she had no time to deal with his shenanigans, she really didn't want to put up too much of a fuss otherwise she'll probably have to stay in Sawyer's presence more and-

She chanced a glance at Sawyer involuntarily. Her heart didn't skip a beat. It was her imagination. Her palms weren't getting slightly sweaty. That was also her imagination. The heat in her face was her imagination.

Fuck. The things Sawyer did to her-

Sawyer's eyes met her own and she hastily shifted her gaze back to Trenchcoat Kid, who looked considerably smugger. It was then she realised that she may have zoned out for a while and needed to answer him before she looked like a total idiot.

It possibly hadn't occurred to her that she was the Demon Queen of Westerberg. She could walk away at any moment and be stopped by losers such as them. Still, she let out a frustrated sigh and caved in, wanting to get out of this awkward situation as quick as possible. “Fine. What would you say if you had the entire world's attention for 30 seconds?”

To Heather's surprise, Trenchcoat Kid seemed to be taking the question seriously. He raised a finger to his chin as his face scrunched up in thought. It was quite a sight. Not the attractive kind of sight. The funny kind of sight.

As Heather was busy distinguishing the kind of 'sight' Trenchcoat Kid was, he lowered his finger from his chin and loosened his face. Heather almost gagged at the smug grin that had replaced the slightly hilarious face he had been making prior.

“I'd tell them that my OTP is best ship and speed run my top reasons why they should ship them.” He looked from Heather to Sawyer and, after lingering his gaze on Sawyer for a moment too long, he quickly glanced at Dumptruck and the nerd and then back to Heather. That was weird, but Heather shrugged it off. She had accepted that The Loser Squad was full of weirdos a long time ago, it wasn't anything new.

Trenchcoat Kid continued, “If they're still listening after the 30 seconds, which they undoubtedly will, then I could spend an entire hour or so telling them _all_ of my reasons to ship it and then I'd spend the rest of that day reading them my fanfiction.”

As Heather had the honour of writing down his answer, paraphrasing it for simplicity, she internally cringed at how stupid the answer was. It was the dumbest answer by far and that was including Kurt and Ram's vulgar answers as well as their promotions for stupid made-up things.

Heather spared a glance towards the other three occupants at the table and found that they were mildly surprised at his answer. Did they never notice his weirdness or something? Heather was sure she'd be able to see it from space. What a bunch of morons.

Before she could finally respond to Trenchcoat Kid's answer, he turned his smug yet mischievous smirk onto Sawyer and, leaning across the table, he asked, “Veronica, what about you? What would you say?”

Heather grunted quietly as she was forced to acknowledge Sawyer's presence. Their eyes met once more and that imaginary stuff that had happened previously had begun to happen again. It was all just her imagination though. She was sure of it.

Her heartbeat was definitely _not_ quickening and her face was _not_ heating up.

Heather shifted from foot to foot, heavily aware of something akin to embarrassment bubbling in the pit of her stomach. Looking at the other girl – definitely not staring – Heather was almost certain that Sawyer was zoning out at that point, giving no thought to the question whatsoever.

Okay, yes, they were both looking – not staring – into each other's eyes – not in a romantic way – and, yes, the question may have been considered difficult to answer especially for a nobody like Sawyer, Heather will give her that. But that didn't stop Heather's frustration from overriding that _feeling_ in the bottom of her stomach.

“I haven't got all day.” She stated, her irritation apparent in both her tone and on her face.

Sawyer's face shifted. It was as if she had just snapped back to reality or something of the sort. A tint of pink then rose to her cheeks as she hurriedly attempted to think of a plausible reply, breaking eye contact as she did so.

“Ah, um, I'd probably take too long trying to think of something so say and just end up taking the full 30 seconds trying to think of something...” Was the answer she settled on.

Trenchcoat Kid muttered something about being wasteful, but Heather paid it no mind as she quickly scribbled down the answer she had received, paraphrasing it slightly for simplicity's sake. Great! Now she can finally get away from these losers!

It was then that she vaguely remembered that there were two others apart of The Loser Squad and so she turned to them, making sure to turn up her vicious aura to the max. Maybe she can indirectly scare them into letting her go.

“You two going to answer the question or can I leave already?” She asked almost as if it were a threat.

Dumptruck and the nerd seemed uncomfortable and scared, but the nerd quickly spoke up after a gulp, “You can leave.”

Finally.

* * *

Instantly as Heather turned around and made a swift retreat from their table, Veronica shot JD another glare. He was the worst person in the world at that point. Not even Heather can top him at that moment. Calling Heather over when Veronica was clearly going to _die_ by the hands of her, what was he _thinking_?

“What the hell was that?” She hissed, leaning over the table so that her words wouldn't have the chance of going unheard.

He only answered with a smirk.

“Are you _trying_ to get us killed?” Betty added in that same hissy tone.

His smirk dropped slightly, clearly unhappy with the fact that one of the people who were supposed to be on his side was currently against him.

“She already hates us enough, you know.” Martha joined in.

Okay, 3 out of 3 people are against his plans. But he wouldn't let that waver his confidence. He is determined and nothing is going to stop him. He simply just offered a chuckle and said, “Just needed to confirm something.”

Veronica raised an eyebrow, clearly unhappy with this explanation. “Which is?”

“Veronica, Veronica, Veronica, you dense, naïve girl.” Upon seeing her confusion rising, he took a sip from the slushie he got from who knows where and said, dismissing the topic entirely, “Just eat your lunch and don't worry about it, Sawyer.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OOC JD... I love it. He's become a total fanboy XD  
> If anyone can correctly guess his OTP, you can have a cookie (although I think it's slightly obvious?) 
> 
> Originally, Kurt and Ram were gonna use those 30 seconds to promote their YouTube channel but then I realised that YouTube didn't exist in 1989 so that was cool.
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it and kudos and comments are always appreciated! (they hella inspire me oof)
> 
> EDIT (03/03/2020): 
> 
> It apparently slipped my mind that (almost) everyone at Westerberg calls Martha 'Dumptruck' and now that I remember, I feel like an idiot for making Heather refer to her as 'Fatty' instead. Thanks, useless memory.


End file.
